You are currently browsing the daily archive for November 2, 2009.

There are as many nights as days, and the one is just as long as the other in the year’s course. Even a happy life cannot be without a measure of darkness, and the word ‘happy’ would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness.

I am going through a truly conflicting time in my life right now. Because the economy has slowed down so much, we have had to learn to live on less of a paycheck while prices for everything continue to reach all-time highs. Feeding our family has become a conflict in relation to paying off debt. Every penny seems to count lately, and our debts and savings are taking a back seat. There are three solutions that I can see, but none of them are ideal.

The first: I could get a job outside of the home. This would mean that our children would go into daycare with a total stranger, which we would pay at least $7 an hour for. I would most likely have to commute, which means more to pay in terms of gas money and car maintenance. Even if I found a “good” job that paid $10 an hour, we would probably lose money in the long run. And I would lose my motherhood: the one thing in my life that I am truly proud of, the one thing that I feel successful at.

The second: My husband could get a second job. This would mean that he would be working nights and weekends, and neither I nor the kids would ever get to see him. I know for a fact that our marriage would suffer, and that I would feel horribly guilty that my kids were missing out on playing with him and learning from him.

The third: We could just suffer through this and hope that it passes. I think we are relatively happy when we aren’t concerned about financial issues. Yes, we won’t be able to pay off our debts and save up for land and a house this way, but we will stay strong as a family. I know we’ll pull through.

As you can probably tell, I’m all for the third option. I realize it will take just that much longer to accomplish our goals, but I’d much rather put that off than endanger my marriage, children, and self-worth. It’s frustrating, yes, having to wait even longer. I can live with a little waiting though. After all, I’ve waited this long.

November 2009

Blog Stats

  • 54,153 hits